In memory of LIBYA'S MARTYR and my FATHER, who I love and miss dearly.

I’m one of those daughters—for better or worse—whose father became a fabulous hero figure for his country LIBYA and his family. The memory of a girl remembering her father taking care of her lovingly and securely. I don’t remember much about my father, but as a child, I do remember he was my hero and I was the apple of his eye. I do remember he was a big fan of books and his library features a collection of classical literature. He was also an avid reader of ‘Reader's Digest’ and it was one of the few magazines he must make time in his schedule to read. I remember he loved listening to Jazz music and Elton John. He also used to listen a lot to his favorite Lebanese singer Fairuz, and had a massive collection of her songs. 

Dear father, I still and will always commit to my memory when you used to seize every chance to drive me all the way from Rabat to Marrakesh so I can feel better, as my allergy was easily triggered by dust mites and mold. Those trips were one of my best experiences with my father, mama and my sisters (my dearest brother wasn't born yet). 

I also remember my father's sense of humor; he used to tease everyone and joke around to make people laugh. He gave people many gifts of laughter, wisdom and taught them to be positive and always see the good in people. I am so grateful and so blessed I had such a wonderful father. I shall carry his beautiful soul and heart around with me everyday. His life with me was too short, yet I am so very grateful for having him for 7 years in my life. 

With you, my days were richer with great memories. Today, there are moments when I feel so crushed but I have my memories and I thank you for them.  

If I could write a million pages, I would still be unable to say just how much I love and miss you every single day. You never said I'm leaving. You never said goodbye. You were gone before I knew it & only God knew why.  A million times I needed you. A million times I cried. If the amount of my tears alone could save you, you never would have died. I'm hurt but not sad, because you died an honorable and noble death- a Martyr. And as they say: ‘Pain can be a gift just not yet revealed. It all depends on how you choose to react to it. Remember it is happening for you, not to you!’

Father, in life I loved you dearly; in death I love you still. It broke my heart to lose you, but you didn't go alone, a big part of me went with you. Your blood- that was viciously sucked by Gaddafi’s thugs shall be a pledge and an oath to honor by being the daughter you’d forever be proud of. I will never say "Good-bye" but I will always say I can hardly wait to see you. 

With all my love today, always and forever your daughter NAFISSA

Allah Yarhamak ya Baba.